More animals?

I live a disappointingly exciting life. I've got many things going on that'll either excite me or make me wish I had a couple of flame-lit poisoned arrows. One of the only things that flip-flops between the two realms of rage and happiness are the animals that I've had and have now. You may have read my little blog on Rex, my cat. Well, there's a completely different case at hand. the Chihuahua.

lol

We got her about a year ago, my neighborhood has an oddly excessive amount of Chihuahuas scrounging about, we noticed this one was skinny so took it upon ourselves to take her in and feed her, then find a new owner for her. We found that only two of the three steps were able to be done, and now we have a Chihuahua. Now, I'd love to tell you her name, but I can't do that since I already have. Her name is Chihuahua. Now, before you go calling me a cryptic man with no creativity, it was a complete accident. I'm horrible with names, I can't think of them at all. I'll end up naming all of my kids "the baby" since I call things general terms such as "man with glasses" or "woman with breasts" when I see something that I don't know the name of. This is inherited from my mom, and we struggled to find a name that worked, so until we found one out, we called her the Chihuahua, and that sorta got dragged on too long and now we have the Chihuahua. You remember the diagram of my body that I made to represent Rex? Well, I recreated it with different data:

Truthfully, this diagram is only partially correct, because this is only the case for this present moment. The chihuahua is usually found within the radius of my mom, because that's the one she took to. Of course I'm second in command, but my mom's got an extreme influence on the Chihuahua, and it's sort of like a traveling companion. Just imagine Pikachu and Ash but without the ability to fight and Pikachu doesn't have the habit of burying food you give him in your sheets. The match-up is basically the basis upon which the Chihuahua's life is found upon at this point. Remember, we found her stray and skinny, chances are she has never been shown love before, my mom was the first to do that and because of that, she's got an extremely close bond with her. So, in times like these when my mom is presently at my grandma's to help her with an estate sale, the Chihuahua, needless to say, is the most annoying being on the planet.

She's insane.

She will not leave me alone, she's basically claimed my lap is her throne, either that or her perch, until my mom returns on Saturday. This is how it always is, she becomes a complete nervous wreck when my mom leaves to the point of me not wanting to be home anymore, I could say she "drives me up a wall", but that's not accurate, since if I were on the wall, she'd find me and whimper until my heart screams from the self-inflicted sound blast of my own screams and consumed emergency cyanide capsules.

It actually reminds me of a teacher I had in 7th grade, who had a dog who suffered the same problem. The solution? Puppy Prozac. But the problem is, it's for puppies and dogs. Chihuahuas are not dogs, I actually make it a point to say that I have two dogs and a Chihuahua. This basically destroys any chance I have at peace until Saturday, and now I can't leave because if I do, and my sister's not home, she's most likely going to either implode/evaporate/explode/separate/disintegrate/create a vortex or any other verb that involves becoming a severely altered form than you were before.

SCIENCE

So, until the time when my mom comes home, I'll be here, miserably waiting for absolution. Note that this isn't new to me, it's happened many times. My mom can't do so much as go to Walgreens without the Chihuahua deciding that she hates her life and nobody loves her. At least until my mom gets back. Then everything's okay.

By the way, why not advertise this page more? Made a Facebook page, if you've got an account, use the link to the right to like it, be kind.